
My dearest #MentalMonday❤️🧠reader. Happy new week and as I write today’s piece, I wonder what kind of Monday you had. Was it marked by the usual detestable Monday blues or today you had good fortune? I wonder if Monday is even a good day to talk about unspoken pain. But alas, this blog is about all things mental health, and at times healing can be uncomfortable, hurting at its most! Mending of the heart will also surely feel like it’s being sewn together with a needle and thread, with the needle having to pierce first before piecing together with the thread that at times slight cuts as it wiggles its way in. So why not use this week’s episode to uncover the weight and impact of unspoken on our mental health.
Within the depths of the human experience lies a peculiar phenomenon: unspoken pain. Sometimes it’s the loudest and deafening sound of silence, threatening the little sanity we have that has kept us going thus far. And on other days, it’s the cyclone of unshed tears that we are constantly battling to keep afloat in. More often than not, it is the way we choke when we try but fail to speak out and we are left with a string of curses of our unspoken pain. It is sometimes made worse by the way the world has certain expectations of us, and we forget to put ourselves first in a quest to fit within the norm. It is the way the world has attached certain things with happiness so much that crying out loud is taken as ingratitude, as defining our own happiness is a privilege we dare not exercise. Many at times, our lives resemble owning a pretty house yet always sitting in it and looking through the window. The lot of us that are trapped in this unspoken pain do not deny that we have good days, the only difference is that these flickers of joy come and go as swiftly as the taste of candy floss excites the tongue and melts away. The joy we know lasts as long as the morning dew ever does, hence, the heart wallops in grief, agony, and pain that no words can express.
And possibly dear reader, you are wondering what it is that we can do to ensure the healing that we both need and deserve. In a world where vulnerability is often seen as weakness, we learn to conceal our pain. We wear masks, constructing elaborate facades to protect ourselves from judgment and rejection. We fear that if we reveal our true emotions, we will burden others or be perceived as inadequate. So, we retreat into ourselves, suffocating in the silence of our unspoken pain. Well, the secret lies in one statement I have since learnt; “We hurt in a community, with our hurt being caused by other people, hence healing can also only happen in the community. In short, everyone needs an audience to hear about their story of pain. It’s a simple need for validation and a pain holder to help them carry this pain until they can walk abreast with it and eventually move away from it. Sometimes the pain we have has been caused by our own decisions and as such we find it hard to forgive ourselves and make peace with that which has been done and can never be undone. We run out of ideas on how we can redeem ourselves but alas, the world is full of secrets for any occasion. And in this case, the secret to happiness is not regretting any decision that you have made so far. Allow yourself to get closure from knowing that at that time, with the information you had, this was by far the best decision possible you could have made.
Unspoken pain can manifest in various forms. It might be the grief of losing a loved one, the ache of a broken heart, or the wounds of a traumatic experience. It can stem from feelings of guilt, regret, or shame that we choose to keep hidden from the world. And whether your pain is from something that happened and should not have occurred, it is valid, it hurt you and you deserve to be heard and given the apology you seek. And if your pain is from something that you feel did not happen and should have happened, that too is very valid, and you deserve an audience for your pain, but above all, a pain-holder.
As we navigate the intricacies of life, it is essential to remember that everyone carries their own unspoken pain. We must cultivate compassion and empathy, creating safe spaces for others to share their burdens. By acknowledging and addressing unspoken pain, we can foster healing and resilience both within ourselves and in our communities. Now, faithful reader, may I close today’s edition by stating that it is time to shake off the dust and remove the masks we have been using to masquerade the corridors of life acting as if all is well. Sending love and light and wishing you the best in finding healing Because#Mentalhealthmatters❤️🧠
Love,
Your every Monday’s pain-holder.








